Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
Randomize
