please come you make the beer taste better
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
My vagina just clenched in fear
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Randomize
