That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
Randomize
