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I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
