dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
Randomize
