Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
Randomize
