I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
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