I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
Randomize