let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
Randomize
