I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize
