Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
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