Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
She's the barista slut.
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
Randomize
