i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
Another f*ing night of vodka youporn and xanax. I need to get a goddamn life
3 great things that go great together... But not on a Friday night. Perfect on say... a Tuesday.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize