I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
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