I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
