I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
Randomize
