shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Randomize
