The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
Randomize
