We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
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