I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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