I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
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