David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
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