he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
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