We won't sleep together?
Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize
