oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
I had a fork in my beer hand and just stabbed my tongue.
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
Randomize
