yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
Randomize
