Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
Randomize
