Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
Randomize