You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
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