How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
please don't ironically join a cult
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