i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
Randomize
