I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
Randomize
