They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
