i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
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