Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
that is very illegal...i love you.
Randomize
