well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
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