If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
She's not a foreskin expert like you
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
