I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
