just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
Alive.
So much puke
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
Randomize
