bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
Randomize
