there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
Lo siento on account of my penis...
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
