Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
I just found a bag of teeth...
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
Randomize
