Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
Randomize
