Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
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