if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
