i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
Randomize
