No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
Randomize
