Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
Randomize
