even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
whose ass print is on the piano?
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
Randomize