She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
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